To: Captain Windowbeard,
The Glass Pearl
Subject: Increasing pirate attacks due to visible treasure in the cargo hold.
Esteemed Captain Windowbeard,
I trust I find you in good health and with excellent spirits, as per the bottle of exquisite rum attachted to this report. As the treasurer of the Glass Pearl, I wish to address a matter of considerable concern. While initially, I was in support of the expensive overhaul of our ship’s structure, made entirely of window glass, it seems there may have been a significant oversight on my part. Our ship’s clear structure has led to a drastic increase in attacks from other pirate vessels. The visibility of our treasure in the cargo hold appears to draw pirates to our ship like moths to a flame.
While showcasing our immense wealth may be a bold statement, I fear it is only a matter of time before we suffer a substantial loss. Therefore, I propose that we consider investing in office window tinting. Melbourne is our next port of call, and it presents an opportune moment to seek professional window tinting services. This would effectively obscure the view of our treasure from potential attackers, reducing the likelihood of targeted assaults.
Additionally, if you still wish to display our wealth and prowess, the window tinting business may be able to provide commercial decorative window services. Melbourne tinters provide an excellent service, I hear, and I am sure they would do a fine job with the ship’s exterior glass. This could serve as an artistic representation of our riches, while simultaneously offering a level of protection for our cargo hold. Examples include glass etchings, stained glass windows or even incorporating gold leaf accents into the ship’s design.
In conclusion, I believe that window tinting and the integration of decorative glass elements would not only safeguard our treasure but also showcase our wealth in a more strategic manner. While I understand that this would be a costly affair, it is better than losing our treasure altogether.
Yours sincerely,
Treasurer Goldfinger
The Glass Pearl